Addicted to the Drama

"God doesn't get rid of all the drama in our lives. He just gets rid of the cheap drama. There is no higher drama than true personal growth. Nothing could be more genuinely dramatic than boys becoming men and girls becoming real women."

-Marianne Williamson


One day it hit me, I was/am addicted to the drama. I love the energy surge that I get when the drama shows up. It makes me feel alive. When this realization came, I started to wonder when this addiction started. The answer may surprise you, it surprised me. To get my answer I had to travel through my cellular memories to visit my ancestors. You see, during slavery, the only way that slaves could survive was to be emotionally shut down. Being emotionally shut down isn’t living at all but it is what had to be done. The only way, the only time they knew they were alive was through the drama. The drama brought energy; it brought emotion back into their lives. So my ancestors started mistaking the drama for living and they passed it on to their children and they passed it on to their children and they passed it on to their children who then passed it on to me. We like to think that slavery was something that happened a long time ago but my grandmother’s grandmother was born a slave, so for me its’ not that far removed. But the wonderful thing about consciousness is that it brings choice. Now that I know the drama isn’t real living I get to choose. I can work on my own emotional expansiveness and learn what real living looks like or I can stay in the cheap drama. The choice is mine.

This journey isn’t just open for me, you can do it too. If you feel your heart racing when the stress of life increases then maybe you are also addicted to the drama. It doesn’t matter how or when your addiction started, consciousness brings choice and choice brings power. If you are waiting to feel courageous before you make this shift know that it won’t happen because courage is a choice not a feeling. The feeling with courage is fear. So, you feel the fear, you choose and act with courage, and you build the strength to be more and more courageous. As Marianne Williamson stated above, the drama never truly goes away. But by choosing when and when not to engage we can get rid of the cheap drama and step into becoming real men and real women.

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© 2019 by Quanita Roberson.