We so think that we get to choose who we are to each other but our job isn't to choose but to discover.
My mother used to tell me that I expected too much from people. I used to think she was right but after she died I realized that it wasn't my expectation that was the issue but that I thought I got to choose who was suppose to fulfill those expectations.
The Matrix Reloaded (2003)
The Oracle: Bingo! It is a pickle, no doubt about it. The bad news is there's no way if you can really know whether I'm here to help you or not. So it's really up to you. You just have to make up your own damn mind to either accept what I'm going to tell you, or reject it. Candy?
Neo: D'you already know if I'm going to take it?
The Oracle: Wouldn't be much of an Oracle if I didn't.
Neo: But if you already know, how can I make a choice?
The Oracle: Because you didn't come here to make the choice, you've already made it. You're here to try to understand why you made it. I thought you'd have figured that out by now.
I so thought that I got to choose who I wanted to be with the people in my life but time and time again I discover that I already have sacred contracts with people. My job is to discover each day who are we now? Because it's constantly changing. I'm different everyday so so are the relationships that I am a part of. It's only when I let go of who I think we are suppose to be together that I can open to who we really are to each other.